Model Cars are Better than Real Cars Because…

  • Real cars rust and model cars don’t, unless you want them to.
  • Your neighbors couldn’t care less that you have 100 model parts cars, but will bitch about the real one you have in the driveway.
  • You can part out two Ferrari models in one month and still make the rent.
  • Model cars don’t affect your auto liability policy.
  • Model car tires never go flat on dark deserted roads.
  • Model cars never leak oil or gas on your driveway.
  • You can have five nice show model cars that stay nice, but keeping one real one nice is a full-time job.
  • Nobody brings five real cars to a show all by themselves, but five model cars fit nicely in a box.
  • When your wife wrecks a model car, it’s a “dusting mishap” and not a reportable accident.
  • You can buy five model cars at once without signing any loan papers.

Written by Tom Geiger as appeared in the Music City Modelers Newsletter.Thanks Tom! 

Viewers entries follow:

    • You do not have to change oil every year. (Submitted by Eric Paz)
    • You don’t have to scrape snow and ice off your model cars’ windshields on winter mornings.      (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • You don’t have to wash ’em! (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • It’s a whole lot cheaper to paint them. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • Replacement parts are a lot less expensive. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • if you dent them, they do not cost a thousand dollars to fix it. (Submitted by Matthew Burnett)
    • you can park hundreds of model cars in your living room. (Submitted by Ben Rader)
    • in the winter your workshop in the basement is warmer than the garage. (Submitted by Jeff Conrad)
    • You can make a modest salary and still afford a ’99 Corvette. (Submitted by Jim Olson)
    • It doesn’t cost mega bucks to insure. (Submitted by Jim Olson)
    • They won’t disturb the neighbors, even in full race gear. (Submitted by Jim Olson)
    • There’s no trash to pick up that your kids threw on the back seat floor. (Submitted by Jim Olson)
    • You Don’t Bust Up Your Knuckles Building Them !!!! (Submitted by Tim Haugh)
    • super glue is easier than socket wrenches (Submitted by Matt Bussard)
    • just because they are. (Submitted by: Louis Kowalski)
    • You don’t have to deal with a pushy salesman when you go buy one. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • YOU decide what color they’re gonna be, not the factory. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • One set of tires lasts a lifetime! (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • You can have all the options you want. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • They’re a lot more fun to work on. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • I’ve never heard of anyone being killed or injured in a model car accident. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • It’s hard for anyone to kill or injure another person with a MODEL car after they’ve had too much to drink. (Submitted by Ken Hart)
    • They cost less and insurance is cheaper. (Submitted by Steve Bonner)
    • You can build what the factory never imagined making for real ! (Submitted by: David Grigsby)
    • You can build a 5000hp car and not go broke paying for gas money.  (Submitted by: David Grigsby)
    • You can tell the chicks that you own a Ferrari and it will kinda’ be true. (Submitted by: Jeff Johnson)
    • THEY WON’T LET YOU DOWN WHEN YOU WANT TO SHOW THEM OFF ( Submitted by Scott Bedell)
    • instead of dishing out ten million dollars on a race car team, you can build 15 racing lamborghinis for less than 500 bucks. (Submitted by: Jonno Reid)
    • because they have more details to them and they rule. because you can make really cool model cars and the real cars because you can do almost anything to model cars but not real cars because it takes a hole more money to make real cars but i know yall are coming out with some cool cars in the year 2000 but i think if yall make a model car you should make the bigger fersion of the car. (Submitted by Tyler Ryan Turner)
    • real cars value drop over time, model car values go up over time. (Submitted by Andy Moses)
    • you don’t need a big garage to keep them in, a shelf is plenty of space. (Submitted by Andy Moses)
    • WELL IF YOU LIVE AT HOME YOUR PARENTS CAN’T COMPLAIN WHEN YOU BRING A NEW CAR HOME EVERY NIGHT OF THE WEEK. (Submitted by: DONALD W BAYCONICH)
    • there is no road rage involved
    • you don’t have to worry about them breaking down!!!!!!!!! (Submitted by Andreas Tomachefiachi)
    • You do not have to be old enough to drive them. (Submitted by Jeremy Turner)
    • they can be cleaned with a feather duster (Submitted by Matt Henson)
    • They don’t polute the air.
    • it only cost’s 20 bucks to paint one. (Submitted by Tim Drake)
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